Do you feel fear when you know, intuitively, you need to (gently) enforce a boundary?
Oftentimes, we can be scared to set the boundaries that we know (deep down) we need to set … because we don’t want to come across as mean. Or unkind.
But, truly, there is ALWAYS a kind way to set a boundary. Boundaries don’t have to include anger, hate, or other strong and heated emotions.
BUT, if you leave it too long to set a boundary, you may end up in a place of anger or hatred, because you might feel you’ve been energetically overstepped / infringed upon *one too many* times.
I know many would be resistant to hearing this, and I’m not saying it’s true for everyone … but sometimes (often?) it’s our own inability to have boundaries in the first place, that leads to these (non-existent) boundaries being ‘crossed’ that one final time.
Like the straw that broke the camels back …
(I can SO relate to this, it’s the story of my life and something I’ve had to work massively on, which is why I write about it so much).
You may be getting delivered the ‘boundary lesson’ again and again (🙄) because you still haven’t learnt how to communicate your needs, with confidence and without guilt.
Or maybe you don’t feel worthy of doing so. (Except, you SO are).
It’s always wise to act on boundary stuff when you *first* know you need to.
When you get that first intuitive nudge to do so.
Rather than letting it play out to a point of strong emotion.
Because this can ruin relationships.
(I’ve seen it happen).
I *always* know when I need to have a stronger boundary.
And while I, too, have in the past put off setting boundaries until I am fully depleted, I have deeply learnt that when you communicate your boundary (or need) straight up, from a place of *loving* honesty?
Other people are generally really receptive. And so kind about it.
Plus, communicating boundaries when you know you need to, will help you avoid burnout!
A good place to start is, ‘Please understand that I’m really not myself at the moment, and I just need some time / space. Thank you’ …
… or something like that! Honest. Truthful. Kind. From the heart.
How can someone argue with that???
Really, none of us need to apologise for having boundaries, and we can always communicate them in a way that is kind, respectful (of both ourselves and others), and honest.
Humans are naturally compassionate at our core, so you may just find that your need for boundaries may be fully respected and appreciated, when you come from a place of genuine, kind expression.
Above all, feel SAFE having boundaries and respecting your energetic needs!!! And trust that they will be respected by the *right* people.
All love –
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Naturopath / Women’s Life Coach // Melbourne, Australia / Skype
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I work as a Naturopath + Life Coach in Melbourne, Australia, and via Skype.
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